Thursday, March 12, 2009

Countdown Live Blog: 3/12/09

Yeah, another night in Tampa...

The Tie: Navy blue.

Number 5: Seymour Hirsch revealed that Adolph XLIII and Herr Goebles Cheney wanted political asassins two nights ago in Minnesota. It's reports for a book he's working on a year or two from now. According to Hirsch, there was a special operations division that was reported to Cheney and killing people. Meanwhile, the CIA said nonsense. Howard Fineman and John Dean are here to seperately make their points known.

Number 4: It looks like the one-oared Good Oldboysnadgirls Party is still going in circles over nothing. Now, it's over chairman Michael Steele's comments on abortion, gays and blacks using "individual" and "choice" in an interview with GQ and since retracted them. Well Clarance Page, will they ever get along?

Oddball: In 2002, the Tom Ridge Department of Homeland Security emergency color code system was invented. So the Hanshein Tigers baseball team had a curse when they dumped a statue of Colonel Sanders into a river in 1985. Well, the statue is out, and will this curse be broken? Meanwhile, at Orlando's Sea World, dolphins are creaing bubbles from their blowhole.

Best Persons: 3 - New York State legislation will charge $10 at gentlemen's clubs in awhole new meaning to "pole tax". 2 - Pennsylvanian Scott Allan Witmer claims that he was his own country after being pulled over for DUI. 1 - Coultergeist's latest book isn't selling like hotcakes...try about down by 50% from her last work of fiction.

Musical Segue: Eric Carmen's "All By Myself." How perfect! You mean Celine Dion wsn't available?

Number 3: House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) has a plane available to her followng the 9/11 attacks given to them from the Adolph XLIII dictatorship. Best thing they ever did. It all started with the far right wing site's "expose", which was parroted by among others ashamed Philadelphia native Michelle Malagong Malkin, one of New York's finest newspapers and Billo The Clown. Lawrence O'Donnell, please tell us what it really is all about.

Still Bushed!: 3 - Texas house to honor Adolph "living each day with everone's safety in mind." Really? 2 - Fighting Iraquis there instead of here has now double digits away from here. 1 - That show thrower will get three years in jail, and another commited blasphamy and was sentanced to 20 years in jail.

Number 2 (Worst Persons in the World)

Bronze - Pirate Rupert's Page Six in one of New York's finest newspapers lies about Olbermann's visit to the Yankees-Red Sox game.
Silver -
Ex-actoress/comic Victoria Jackson supports Inanity, Tina Fey's Evil Twin and Comedian Boss Limbaugh, spouting the right wing Fixed Noise commie propaganda.
Gold - Newt Gingrich wants to sponsor teenage pregnancy for your government... or so he says... check please!

Number 1: So you want to put something on a billboard near Comedian Boss Limbaugh's home/studio/underground bunker/GOP Headquarters? The Democrats had a contest for such, and the winner was... [Drumroll please] AMERICANS DID NOT VOTE FOR A RUSH TO FAILURE! So Margaret Carlson, all we want to know is did the guy from Camden, NJ was right? Runner ups included "RUSH HOUR IS OVER IN AMERICA", "FAT, DUMB AND REPUBLICAN IS NO WAY GO THROUGH LIFE", "DO NOT FEED THE EGO" and "BRING ME THE WOOKIE AND SOLO" (once said by Roger Ailes.)

My choice (if I had one) would have been "DRIVE BY THIS!" See you manana...

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