One whole week untl Inauguration Day, 2,075 since "Mission Accomplished" in Iraq, 19 days until Super Bowl XLII in Tampa, 32 days until Sping training begins for pitchers and catchers and 82 days until the Philadelphia Phillies open defense of the 2008 World [BLEEPING] Championship. Did I mention by the way that this is Night One of American Idol Season Eight V 2.0?
The Tie: Gray with white and blue crosswaves.
Number 5: Pointlessly Impeachment of Clinton II: The Charity Editon. Sen. Lugar wants Bill to stop collecting foreign gifts to The Clinton Foundation, especially those in good faith and all of them will be disclosed. And on policy, Hilary will engage not taking options off the table in a new approach to become a cornerstone of the Obama administration, and getting out of Iraq is Priority One. Jonathon Alter joins us in DC to anaylize, and says she'll use all the tools in her toolbox to her advantage.
Has it been a year since the New Hampshire Primary?
Meanwhile, back on the W. Is For Whitewash Watch, Adolph XLIII's gratitude to the final cabinet meeting (and counting down at Countdown has NEVER been this fun) leaving with his head held high (up his roodypoo candy ass.) Howard Fineman joins us for the Reader's Digest Condensed Edition of the whole story, and includes the lifers (as it were) including a slide show featuring comedic comment by Shecky Bush, appearing next week at the Chuckle Hut.
Number 4: Herr Goebels Cheney calls Gitmo "clean" and anything but a four diamond AAA resort, but he tells poker expert Bill Bennett it's okay, but says that there are ten percent of the 250 prisoners are being fed via feeding tubes due to a hunger strike. Cheney slaps Obama around on the closing, wishing he had done it on his watch. Two more tons of bullshit in a one-and-three-quarters ton bag. Chris Hayes of The Nation answers it all for you.
Oddball: Forty years tomorrow, Jason Bateman was born. FoK (Friend of Keith). Man vs. freezing in Tokyo achieving highs. And the Commander-in-Chief Ball will have a big 500-pound Presidential Seal cheesecake.
Best Persons: 3 - Pope Benedict XVI has issued a edict on Virgin Mary sightings. 2 - A German firehouse burned down in front of the fire company. 1 - Five kids in White Plains, New York steals a 50-year-old man's briefcase and then taunt the guy on his stolen cellphone without a tracer? CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?
Musicial Segue: Take a shot, was it Leadbelly? This should have called for Raffi's "BananaPhone" sped up x2.
Number 3: GonzoGate is baaaaaack! When one of his aides tesified during the hearings for Fredo, he said that he turned an blind eye to politics and race. Until they found an e-mail with slurs and nasty comments about Democrats, it looked like this guy that was picking the wrong week to give up the Bill of Rights, smoking, drinking, the Equal Right Act, sniffing glue, uppers and the Civil Rights Act, especially when his name was Bradley Schlozman.
Bushed!: 3 - That presser yesterday? White House interns filled empty seats when attendance was underwhelming. 2 - Conzi hears that Iraq is now celebrating Christmas. Good for Iraq. 1 - W. Is For Whitewash: Appealing for money for Adolph XLIII at the RNC. Lies, bullshit, gave us an example, please?
Number 2 (Worst Person in the World)
Bronze - Lou Dobbs said that Obama and Mexico's president Calderon didn't talk about NAFTA. But they did.
Silver - Insanity said that women refered to women as bitches, but Ted Nugent calling Hilary a bitch is another story. Rachael Maddow P\/\/NS YOU, INANITY!
Gold - Billo the Clown shows a clip from 24 and we're supposed to take him seriously... JACK BAUER ISN'T REAL!
Number 1: I'm waiting for SNL to bring Tina Fey back to reprise her killer Sarah Palin impression. Check that, I'm DYING to see Elizabeth Santamatina Fey return to SNL and reprise her Evil Twin Sister's impression. Fancy pagent walking and all. Palin did yet another interview, this time with Esquire Magazine saying she was indeed muzzled by the McCain campaign on subjects. You surely can't stop the snowball that is Miss Wasalia 1984, and you betcha that you can't try to contain it, either. (Sorry, Dan.) Dr. Phil, much? Yes, she can see Alaska from her house, hates bloggers (OUCH!) and the interviews with Charlie and Katie were fair, according to Mike Huckabee. Eugene Robinson speaks on behalf of the media to explain this all.
See you tomorrow. I have to cover my windows to prevent extreme chills drafting into my house for the next week.
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