Thursday, January 22, 2009

Countdown Live Blog: 1/22/09

Ten days until the Steelers and Cardinals meet in Super Bowl XLIII.

The Tie: Black, white and tan stripes.

Number 5:
As expected, President Obama signed the Gitmo closures as of January 22, 2010, and also oredered the closure of the private CIA prisons. All 245 suspects will be examined for war crimes trials, and Sen. Corum doesn't want them in Texas. Robert Gibbs, the news press secratary, says our security will not be compromised. Meanwhile, Rich Holdbrook will be the envoy for Afganistan and Pakistan, wile George Mitchell will oversee Mideast peace talks, and Hilary wants everyone to think outside the box. Andera Mitchell says Rep. Kirsten Gillibrand (D-NY) will replace Hilary in the Senate. Richard Wolffe joins us with both feet on the ground running to review the first 48 hours.

Military leaders included Maj. Gen. Paul D. Eaton, USA (Ret.) was a witness to the history and joins Keith to tell us what he knows about the whole Gitmo mess.

This explains the Number 4 Story in a nutshell.


Number 4: The picture above explains what Herr Goebles Cheney said about Scooter Libby, about having to have been pardoned. Watergate survivor John Dean comments. With friends like Scotter, Fredo, Dana and Turdblossom, who in the fucking hell needs enemies?

Oddball:
In 1947, KTLA-TV signed on and one guy's still on the job. A frozen lake finds Biscuit the dog on an ice floe literally putting the Biscuit in the basket, thanks to the Indianapolis Fire Department. And in the Australian Open, smashes to the head of ballpersons.

Best Persons:
3 - Nancy Charlez looked like a $20K winner... and was robbed. She called it "bull[shit]." 2 - Billo The Clown is going Paul Revere. Thanks for not changing your name, and stealing former Fixed Noise host John Gibson's material. 1 - Unnamed red light runner in Phoenix caught under moving van. Now he has a bad back and a visit to the big house infirmary.

Musical Segue:
The lyrics (not the title) said "Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide." Should have been Martha Reeves and the Vandellas if you ask me.

Number 3:
Night Two of the alligations on the NSA's watch on everyone, including the media, as Russell Tice returns to tell all, and Lawrence Wright's daughter was wrapped up in this mess. The NSA was unavailable for comment, and the Obama White House will blow whistles.

Number 2: James Risen of The New York Times joins us to confess that he's being watched.

Still Bushed!: 3 - Gonzo is still clueless at the Bush farewell party in El Paso Tuesday. 2 - Halliburton on death by electricution of an Army sergant taking a shower was neglicent homicide. 1 - As we were detaining them in Gitmo and Europe, but there may be a lawsuit to come though.

Number 1: Worst Persons in the World, The JFein Makes A Prediction Edition Picking Comedian Rush Limbaugh FTW (First time it's been numbero uno ever!)
Bronze
- John Gibson says that while minding his biz and MSNBC's boss comes to the house, and it's a twisted member of the network and they went smart.
Silver
- Sorry, JFein, but Limbaugh interviewed by Inanity with the racism stuff on President Obama. Hey, Rush, say Hi to Michael Weinersavage.
Gold - John Fein, CEO of Merrill Lynch paying out bonuses for CEO's, and a million dollar makeover of his office, all with bailout money from Bank of America, and we demand a refund. He was sacked today.

I'll catch you tomorrow...without an expensive three-handled moss covered family credenza.

3 comments:

  1. Christus in panem (Christ on a cracker?)

    And Martha and the Vandellas -- Dancin' in the Street is all I've been posting everywhere since the election.

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  2. One minor observation re WPITW: Phil G. is a very smart man. Very smart indeed.

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  3. Correct, Irline! Bonus for the latin reference as well.

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