Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Countdown Live Blog: 12/3/08

There's 48 days until the Inauguration of Barack Obama, 2,043 days since "Mission Accomplished" in Iraq, 22 days until Christmas (and a tree lighting tonight next to Keith), 59 days until Super Bowl XLIII and 73 days until pitchers and catcher report for Spring Training.

The Tie: Pink.

Number 5: I'll see your six intel reports a week, and raise you seven, Adolph XLIII. Compitition between him and President-elect Obama is good with that. And more of "W. Is For Whitewash" which is now being called "The Bush Legacy" sponsored by none other than turdblossom, and he said if they knew there were no WMDs, they would have not gone to Iraq. Hello from Mid-America, Eugene Robinson to tell us it's all symbolic. "These are serious people who are willing to listen to you..." Excuse me, but I'd like to call Mullarkey and his brothers, Blarney, Shenanagans and BS to the stand.

And then the torture programs to the question "What Do We Do Now?" The incoming administration wants Gitmo closed, and no more torture in the CIA. Welcome "Matthew Alexander", who wrote a book about that under security reasons. And it's not effective. Surely, they jest. They didn't, and as the punchline goes, "not one was named Shirley." He wants the torture banned through all levels of the government. Good call.

Number 4: Tina Fey lookalike Sarah Palin got Saxby Chambliss re-elected as Georgia senator over Jim Martin and appeared on Fixed and Fiends to credit her. Bill Clinton as New York Senator succeeding his wife is being denied all over. E.J. Dionne is now saying that it was the WORP (White Older Rich Party) that turned out to re-elect Chambliss. Oh, Palin won't run for Senate from Alaska in 2010 for now, because the imcumbant female Republican says it's a brief whistle stop to her 2012 Presidential campaign. Also, in Minnesota, Al Franken says they're up by 22 votes while the official count says imcumbant Norm Coleman up by 303.

Oddball: Another Hackney School teacher gets well soon. And there's a walrus that plays the sax. I smell Milli Vanilli. In Bloomington, Illinois, they turn reindeer droppings into Christmas orniments, a clever segue into Bill-O's War on Christmas.

Best Persons: 3 - Experian says that the number three news show is Countdown. Ahead of the Billo-The-Clown Hour, but behind The New York Times and The Drudge Report. 2 - An Sunoco station in Pennsylvania had been robbed by someone in a paper plate mask. but they ran away after the clerk asked to remove that mask. 1 - Minor injuries to a cop in Houston (Hello!) after being rear ended by a drunk tow truck driver.

Musical Segue: "Twenty Four hous of drunk driving, man." That's all I got.

Number 3: Michael Moore talks about the pending bailout of the Big Three automakers. Moore's pitch? Give GM 1/6th of the $18 billion they want, based on the costs of the common stock. Treat it like FDR did: You can't make cars, build hybrids and mass transit. In other words "we'll own your ass," and that's all he's gonna say about that.

Bushed!: 3 - Pentagon had the highest recruitment reups up 20% from four years ago What's a few missing limbs, we ask. 2 - More on torture. An Arab was tortured for three months and confessed then into jail and got away. Call the ACLU. 1 - Gitmo and post-stress stuff on the current Attorney General. Looks like he's picked a bad week to give up psychiatric care.

Number 2: Worst Persons
Bronze - Sean Avery is a douchenozzle after making comments about famous ex-girlfriends. (Here's one of 'em.) Especially in the city where Dion Phaneuf, now happens to be one of the former girlfriends' beau.
Silver - Bill Cunningham teals us that a promo at the Cincinnati Zoo has been cancelled in conjunction with the Creationism Museum including a saddle on a dinosaur. All for the savings of one dollar...
Gold - Sean Inanity blames Obama's election on reading bumber stickers that talk to you. *palmslap*

Number 1: It's time for the annual attack known as the Bill Orally so-called War on Christmas. Here's the video proof for you.

They've lit the tree up in front of 30 Rock much like Billy Wagner blowing a sure save for the Mets, so I'll see you tomorrow.

No comments:

Post a Comment