Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Countdown Live Blog: 12/16/08

There are 35 days left until Inauguration Day, there have been 2,056 days since "Mission Accomplished" in Iraq, nine days until Christmas, 15 days until the big ball drop at Times Square, 46 days until Super Bowl XLIII, 60 days until pitchers and catchers report for Spring Training and109 days until Opening Night in the City That Loves You back.

The Tie:
Silver and tan with black stripes with a Godfather pinstriped suit.

Number 5:
Herr Gobles, er, Vice President Cheney says if he didn't know about the WMD in Iraq then there wouldn't have been a war in Iraq...and 2,000 Americans dead including Pat Tillman. Meanwhile, the guy who threw that shoe at Adolph Bush XLII said that his arm is broken after being turned over to the Iraqi authorities. Richard Wolffe said that Cheney's legecy will be like Bush's: "W. Is For Whitewash."

And has Gobels, um, Cheney admitted he did war drimes? What was done with Sheik Muhammed? Jonathan Turley says that question of was it a war crime was answered with a yes. Oh, if the Democrats were in charge four years ago, the impeachments would have been swift and fair. And remember, when it comes to waterboarding, "Nobody expects The Spanish Inquisition!"

Number 4:
Nancy Pelosi wasnts no back door dealing while with Obama's new administration. And oh, those zany - ZANY? There's that word again! - Republicans, bringing up Elian Gonzalez on the nomination of your new Attorney General. Lawrence O'Donnell is back to translate this into human for the rest of us.

Oddball: This date in 1961, Bill Hicks was born poking fun at religion. And college hazing at University of the Phillipines is masked with the face. That is all. And deep dish dopiness in 30 minutes or less.

Best Persons: 3 - Michael Smith won the local spelling bee in Charlotte, NC and was greeted with a misspelled sign. 2 - In St. Paul, MN, Darnell Frazier claimed was Darnell Lewis. Check ID, then tatoo. 1 - And in Taipei a politician lost his toupee. And dropped trou.

Segue Music:
AC/DC's "Caught With Your Pants Down."

Number 3:
President Adolph will be signing bills protecting companies pushing new regs overruling your right to sue for everything but the kitchen sink. Might as well as add the kitchen sink to that list. Chris Hayes from The Nation is here to tell us about it, and welcome to the 19th Century.

Bushed, The Revisionist History Version: 3 - Iraq should apologize for the shoe tossing because we were being a guest. 2 - George Will said to Laura Ingrham that Adolph XLIII's memoirs as a sci-fi with Harriet Myers' nomination to the SCOTUS. 1 - Taliban elimination lies after all.
The President is full of ****.

Number 2: Worst Person in the World

Bronze - Blackwater CEO says he accuses those on why he followed orders.
Silver - Turdblossom tells us to ignore Blagogate, disagreeing with none other than Turdblossom.
Gold -
Comedian Rush Limbaugh on the ropes after Colin Powell, and they're not even maverick Republicans.

Whoa, Breaking news! Rahm Emanuel according to the Chicago Sun-Times was taped 21 times speaking on wiretaps on Obama's seat to Blago.

Number 1: And speaking about that shoe tosser, which replaces Blagogate as our new passion among those at Countdown, we're comparing it to the Western bar scenes in The Blues Brothers movie. YouTube is making fillums, there's an online game encourging you to toss shoes, and more motherlode comedy gold mine galore. Joel McHale from E's The Soup joins us from La La Land sans the Miley Cyrus ("It's Miley!") boyfriend ("It's a felony!") jokes.

That's it for me, so I'll see you tomorrow after I trim the Christmas tree...and then put up the Festivus pole right next to it.

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