Friday, August 14, 2009

Countdown Live Blog: 8/14/09

TheTie: Black.

Number 5: President Obama went to an unfiltered town hall in Montana and a real working man asked about real health care. Randy Rathie joked about "those cable networks" as the only place to get his news. He then threw one of his senators under the bus on the subject, and no death panel or other Good Oldboysandgirls Party about it, and that's what Bill Clinton did tell those bloggers in Pittsburgh, and Sen. Kent Conrad (D-ND) and Rep. Leonard Boswell (D-IA) are on opposite sides of the story. Hello again, Howard Dean.

The Stimulai Bill was warned by Paul Krugman on those GOP dim bulbs tht are not from the far right. Eugene Robinson, got any clues?

Number 4: Sens. Chuck Grassley (R-IA) and Arlen Specter (D-PA) are Twittering in a fight on he end of life consultation, and Miss Wasilla 1984 claims that she had that both removed from the bills. Cue Schoolhouse Rock and that "Conjunction Dysfunction Junction, What's your function?" song. Am I right Chris Kofinis? Oh, he's just a bill up on Capitol Hill whilst on recess.

Oddball: In 1935, FDR signed the Social Security bill. Snake wranger Justin Matthews saved a python in Bradenton, Florida, and lived to tell about it. But he planted it all. On Canadian TV, a British Columbia's midday newscasts proved never work with kids or animals...especially on live television.

Best Persons: 3 - John Mackey of Whole Foods told The Murdoch Street Journal about health care as socialism, and there is a threat of a boycott on the Whole Foods website boards. 2 - Skeezix called saying CBS News claimed that he didn't read GOP Stalking points. 1 - Simon Fraser now has "F-D" as a grade. Dean Wormer told them "Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life."

Musical Segue: Sam Cooke's "What a Wonderful World It Would Be."

Number 3: Professor Harold Hill lost more advertisers, including Radio Shack, er, "The Shack", ConAgra and some Big Pharma. Newt Gingrich again gets the idiot award because of the LaCrosse, Wisconsin hospital has cheaper last two years of life than UCLA Medical Center. Comedian Boss Limbaugh read ads for living wills. Rep. Larsen (D-WA) even mocked Prof. Hill, and The Daily Show and John Stewart (America's most trusted news anchor) showed some video proof otherwise of Prof. Hill under the knife, and blasted the boss at GE, MSNBC's owner. Video proof in the pudding below.

Number 2 (Worst Person in the World)
Bronze - Lou Dobbs keeps digging deeper in Howard Dean's hole about the bloodsucking thing.
Silver - Rudy Giulaiani, "America's Mayor", joins the death watch panel shouters.
Gold - Rep. Michele Bachman (R-MN DWARF STAR PLUTO) in a fund-raising letter attacks the writer in the Minneapolis Star-Tribune thanking his son, Harrison, on joining that "secret Obama Army" known as Americorps.

Number 1: Turdblossom will follow Comedian Boss Limbaugh (and Keith) on Family Guy? Joe The Not Really a Plumber doing stand up comedy? Okay, what's the punchline? No, seriously... I'm still waiting for the return of Bob Grossbeard, President of Quahog Oil, although I hear Mr. Olbermann wll be working The Cleveland Show with Mama Bear Huffington this fall as a guest voice. Limbaugh was already in "Blue Peter" as himself. Real comic Christian Finegan joins us for the punchline.

Have a great weekend, and I'll see you Monday.

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