I have been very serious in my criticizing and condemnation of Fox for doing a split-screen for Manny Ramirez's at-bats in his second game back from steroid suspension during the Muts-Phillies game on Saturday. And one of my main and favorite articles to read and site on this blog was Keith Olbermann's post on his MLBlog, The Baseball Nerd. Well, Dan Steinberg of The Sporting Blog responded and guess what folks, we have an epic flame war of hilarity!
If you've been around the block at all for the past few days, I am sure you have seen this post by now, but if not, here is the link to my post quoting Olbermann's blog on his indignation and outrage over Man-Ram. Just for the sake of space and redundancy, I won't bring up the block quote for a 3rd time (besides, most of what he says shows up in Steinberg's blockquote. Apparently Dan Steinberg read and got a hold of it and if you've ever watched Countdown with Keith Olbermann, after reading this quote, you'll understand what I mean when I say he Keith Olbermann'd Keith Olbermann. Here's Steinberg's response via his post on The Sporting Blog.
And so I ask, please, someone, anyone, give us a little outrage. What's that, Keith Olbermann? You have something to say?
"Let's take you out to San Diego where Manny Ramirez is just back from a 50-game suspension. For cheating. For cutting corners. For breaking rules. For lying. For deception. For letting down his teammates. For contributing to suspicions against every honest player. For raising a giant middle finger to sportsmanship. For abusing the fans. For risking that for which Lou Gehrig would've given anything -- his own health."
For sneaking boogers into ballpark pizza cheese. For publicly admitting he likes Tiramisu better than Apple Pie. For feeding rat poison to toddlers. For ruining America.
"Ramirez, of course, homered today in his first at bat. And some people cheered. As if he were just back from an injury, or a death in the family. As if he were a hero. As if he were an honest man. As if he were somehow worthy of sharing the meaningfulness of this day with Lou Gehrig."
As if he were worthy of being alive, Keith; of sharing the status of "human being" with Lou Gehrig. Manny Ramirez should have declined all offers of oxygen, on this day, and on every other day that is an anniversary of a day on which Lou Gehrig was alive.
"This is Lou Gehrig's day. The rest of the juicers may come back and play tomorrow and there will not be boycotts. The Dodgers will probably go to the World Series, carried in part by a great flaming fraud like Ramirez. And judging by the brainless response of fans who would cheer anybody if they hit the ball 425 feet for their team, and boo anybody if they hit the ball 425 feet for their opponents, there will not even be significant repercussions."
For shame, for shame, baseball fans. You should all be standing in line to forfeit your mindless baseball entertainment, on account of there having been rule-breaking in that industry, which is devoted primarily to occupying the minds of 30-something lawyers with expense accounts, middle-aged journalists and college kids making fictional "trades" at 3 in the morning while eating week-old pizza slices they found in their closets. Why, oh why, don't you brainless masses boycott this farce in favor of a more wholesome, ethical and Gehrig-approved entertainment option? Like, go check out MSNBC's "Oddball" video page. Current options include "Pig Parade Held in Philippines," "Monkey Pee Monkey Do," and "Woman Puts Squirrel in Tank Top." I know for a fact that Gehrig could not get enough of the squirrel inside the tank top bit. In fact, he used to regularly stuff ferrets into his underwear.
"Manny Ramirez and Alex Rodriguez and the others of the PED era did not belong in baseball today, and that they did not show the requisite awareness of their own shame, only makes it worse. Lord, send us a 'roider who has the presence of mind to say: "On this day I do my penance; I don't yet belong on the field even with just the memory of this man, I hope you'll forgive me and I can again earn your trust."
Because, you know, the world would never have a cross word to say about a 'roider who completely upstaged Lou Gehrig Day with a self-centered stunt involving a self-righteous self-benching. No, that'd be just swell.
Anyhow, I would argue further: that no one not named Gehrig should ever again be allowed to play baseball, even Strat-O-Matic. And that Manny Ramirez should be tasered every night for a year. And that the fans who have cheered for him should be tasered, too. And that Manny Ramirez is, pretty much, the Worst Person in the World. And that anyone who so much as cashes one check paid for with dirty baseball money from immoral cheering fans should be banished from civilized society.
Wait, Keith, why is there an MLB logo on your blog? Nooooooooooooooooooooo!
I agree with what Keith Olbermann says on the matter, and yet, this criticism from Steinberg is cleverly written and brillantly hilarious. He uses pretty much every tool in the book that Keith Olbermann utilizes in his Special Comments and uses them against him in a sarcastic way that is pure hilarity!
I hadn't heard previously of Dan Steinberg and his blogs at The Washington Post and The Sporting News, but he goes a long way to defend Manny Ramirez and skewer me for what I wrote here Saturday (I think that's what he's doing - it's not exactly clear; it seems to be snark, a medium in which I've worked for 35 years, and whatever it is, I think he's doing it wrong). I criticized the juxtaposition of Fox's celebration of Ramirez's return and the MLB-wide official tributes to Lou Gehrig on the 70th Anniversary of his "day" at Yankee Stadium in 1939.
"As if he were worth of being alive, Keith; of sharing the status of "human being" with Lou Gehrig. Manny Ramirez should have declined all offers of oxygen, on this day, and on every other day that is an anniversary of a day on which Lou Gehrig was alive."
I confess to being mightily impressed at the head of steam he builds up on the long trek he makes towards his great climactic accusation of hypocrisy on my part.
"For shame, for shame, baseball fans. You should all be standing in line to forfeit your mindless baseball entertainment, on account of there having been rule-breaking in that industry, which is devoted primarily to occupying the minds of 30-something lawyers with expense accounts, middle-aged journalists and college kids making fictional "trades" at 3 in the morning while eating week-old pizza slices they found in their closets. Why, oh why, don't you brainless masses boycott this farce in favor of a more wholesome, ethical and Gehrig-approved entertainment option?"
I also confess to becoming afraid for him as he accelerates, the way we all used to become afraid for the Coyote in the Roadrunner cartoons, since we could see the edge of the mesa coming and he couldn't.
"I would argue further: that no one not named Gehrig should ever again be allowed to play baseball, even Strat-O-Matic. And that Manny Ramirez should be tasered every night for a year. And that the fans who have cheered for him should be tasered, too. And that Manny Ramirez is, pretty much, the Worst Person in the World. And that anyone who so much as cashes one check paid for with dirty baseball money from immoral cheering fans should be banished from civilized society.
Wait, Keith, why is there an MLB logo on your blog?
Nooooooooooooooooooooo!"
Umm... as anybody who reads the MLBlogs knows, baseball has no say over what is written here, by me, or anybody else. And, yes, this particular blog, MLB pays for. Only I don't get checks to cash. The money gets split three ways: to St. Jude's Hospital, to the Baseball Assistance Team, and to the education fund for the grandchildren of the former big leaguer and MLB.TV host John Marzano.
That was a long way to run to wind up going off a cliff like that. At least Mr. Steinberg was good enough to provide his own sound effect at the end.
But wait! There's even more to this hilarity! If you click on the above link and look closely, Steinberg actually responded to Olbermann in the comments section!
Well, the final line was added after I had already finished, and I guess I'll agree that it gives the wrong impression. Although I didn't really think you got paid for doing this. The point was more that you are associated with the official apparatus of MLB, which has clearly been pretty well filled with cheaters of various degrees for a long, long time. Seems to me either you give up on an entire generation of baseball fans, or you just accept the fact that cheaters were everywhere and you move on with your life. When so many were cheating, to me, it's a systemic problem and not a sign of individual moral failing.
As for the rest of the slop quoted above, apologies for not just writing what I thought. Here's what I think: there are so very many problems in the world that deserve outrage, many of which you highlight on TV. Manny Ramirez sullying the image of a man who's been dead for decades by trying to hit a ball with a piece of wood on a day his employer told him he was eligible just doesn't strike me as one of them.
And if you want to say that being outraged about Manny is also a topic unworthy of outrage, I will concede the point.
As for never having heard of me, I was the fella who turned up Miles Rawls, the Wizards fan who taunted Prez Obama this spring. You quoted from my piece extensively, on the air! And I thought that made us bff!
If you're not laughing right now at either what Steinberg and/or Olbermann said or just at the fact that 2 grown men (one of them being a multi-million dollar TV star) are having an online flame war about something like this, then there's gotta be something wrong with you because this is great! Good times.....gooooooooooood times.
For a great discussion on this, listen to today's episode of On The DL.
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