Countdown Live Blog: 6/16/09

(Guest posted by JFein from Fire Andy Reid Now!)

Let's get this party started!

Today we've got Iran and Twitter, Obama is going Bushian by not releasing a visitor list, evidence that torture does not work, and Mary Catheryn Ham is criticizing Obama's mistake while making a spelling error herself in worsts, and Palin's accepting of Letterman's apology.

The tie: Black with silver and purple stripes.

Number 5: More disturbing images from Iran. Apparently they never heard of political civility. Were some ballots not counted or ignored? And we've got Twitter getting involved and being taken offline for a bit by the U.S. Government because of it's vital use thus far in the Iranian presidential election. I never thought I would see the day. John McCain is not happy about it, and is vehement about this being a sham of election. Staying on the subject of McCain for a bit, in 1988, the American people knocked once for the Father, in 2000 they knocked twice and got the Son, thank goodness there was not a 3rd knock in 2008 and we did not end up with the Holy Ghost (/Fall Out Boy'd). We've got Richard Engel of NBC News who is sporting that clean cut look thath the 1990s will be laughed at for in later decades. I pretty much said as much on this Iran incident last night and aside from the new breakthrough of Twitter, I don't have really anything to add. And I don't have anything about Twitter either. Other than what is happening in Iran is certainly not a tweet. Get it? Tweet......it sort of sounds like treat.....as in this is not a good thing. Hello? Hello? Is this thing on? Back to Countdown, why does Engel insist on calling Ayatollah Khomeni, The Supreme Leader? I mean, I know that's what his title is, but he couldn't call him Ayatollah Khomeni, as in The Supreme Leader's name? (and Ayatollah is the title of Supreme Leader). Props to Engel, though. I've never seen anyone a random guest on Countdown drone on and on and on and on and on like he just did.

Richard Wolffe is here. Here's a little known and/or forgotten fact, Richard Wolffe actually was a member of the press that constantly followed around George W. Bush during the campaign of the would be controversial Election of 2000. Iran is talking about what is to be done about Iran and whether or not what McCain's motives are for the aforementioned comments.

And still to come, Obama and the White House are for some random reason keeping the names of visitors to the White House from the American people. Yeah, that's against the Supreme Court ruling and just flat out stupid. And more on waterboarding and torture.

Number 4: The Obama Administration is not giving out the names of White House visitors, which does go against court rulings. And this is something that was done by everyone's favorite presidential administration, the Bush Administration! Chris Hayes from The Nation joins us. And yeah, I'm not quite sure what the point of this is either. And that is something that a mass amount of people only get curious about is when it is deprived of the American people. And all of a sudden this turned into a conversation about gay marriage. How, I'm not sure. But while we are on that subject, SUPPORT GAY MARRIAGE NOW!!! (/Strong feeling toward issue'd).

We;ve got an animal coming out of a soda machine and Mr. Bouncy Bouncy is a Worst Person. Will he win the gold or will Miss I Can't Spell take the honors? Find out later tonight!

Oddball: The first newscast premiered on this day in history. And in Tulsa, there was a drunk guy who somehow ended up on the top of a roadsign. And also in TUlsa, ther is a raccoon in a Pepsi machine! Hmmm......tastes like Coke. And President Obama's CNBC interview was interrupted by a fly and HE SMACKED AND KILLED THE FLY!!!!! BOO!!!!! YOU STINK!!!! Sorry, I have a compassion for animals (/good friend sending me disturbing video and ranting about how animals should not be abused'd).

Best Persons

3 - A man who was reported missing was really fishing. His wife reported him missing after saying he could leave. 2 - A man ended up with 176 tickets. 1 - Some genius literally shot himself in the ass. No, really. He had a gun in his pocket, it went off, and a bullet went straight up the ole deriere. I bet he has a real pain in the ass now.

Aspeaking of pain in the ass, how about Artie Lange on Joe Buck Live last night? Damn, that was brutal. Here's where to go if you want to see the only time I have ever felt bad for Joe Buck.

Number 3: The 9/11 mastermind allegedly lied while being tortured about the location of Osama Bin Laden. Yes, he gave a location and yes, he made one up. If only they could hire Cal Lightman in order to detect lying, that way we would not for sure whether KSM (I will not embarrass myself by trying to spell his full name) was lying about the location of bin Laden, and in turn, figure out where Bin Laden was. Jonathan Landan from McClatchy Newspapers (Where......???????) joins us. Is it just me, or does it seem wrong that that voice is coming out of that body (talking about Landan).

Worst persons coming up next! Who will take the gold? Find out next!

Numer 2 (Worst Persons In The World)

Bronze - Tom Cox, running for U.S. Senate, hired a bakers' dozen illegal immigrants for seven years.

Silver - Mary Catherine Ham of the Weekly Standard criticized Obama for making a gaffe, but in that column, she spelled the number 2 as "too". Um, irony much?

Gold - It's Comic Bouncy!!! (See what I did there?) Limbaugh is speaking on behalf of the LGBT. And making no sense in the process.

Number 1: I covered this story in the post below so I won't go into great depth here, but I did not catch the fact that Palin once again got the Constitution wrong in that Freedom of Speech in the U.S. Bill of Rights does not cover what is said on TV. You'd think that a history major such as myslef would catch that. And people are still protesting in front of the Late Show. All 10 of them, that is. Margaret Carlson has more.

Tomorrow at 5:45, healthcare benefits will be extended to partners of gay/lesbian employees of the federal government.

See you tomorrow for I Survived A Japanese Game Show live blog. Not sure how it will be done yet, but it will be done.

David Letterman Vs. Sarah Palin Has Finally Ended...We Think....

(Guest posted by JFein from Fire Andy Reid Now!)

Our national nightmare is over. David Letterman issued a lenghty, sincere apology last night for his comments about Sarah Palin's daughters being at the baseball game. Here is Letterman's apology in full.



And the question was raised last night on Countdown whether or not the Governor of Alaska would accept Letterman's apology. The answer to that is yes, she did. Sort of. Here is Palin's acceptance which she gave in the form of a statement to FoxNews.com.

In a statement to FOXNews.com early Tuesday, the Alaska governor said, "Of course it's accepted on behalf of young women, like my daughters, who hope men who 'joke' about public displays of sexual exploitation of girls will soon evolve."

"Letterman certainly has the right to 'joke' about whatever he wants to, and thankfully we have the right to express our reaction," Palin said. "This is all thanks to our U.S. Military women and men putting their lives on the line for us to secure America's Right to Free Speech - in this case, may that right be used to promote equality and respect."

Palin's acceptance was certainly lackluster, if you ask me. Watch Letterman and look at Palin's acceptance again. Letterman apologized directly to Palin, Bristol, Willow, and co. for the joke. Palin accepted it on behalf of young women, not personally directing it, which is not a huge problem if you ask me as a lot of women and feminist groups were angered by Letterman's remarks a week ago, but instead of sincerely directly addressing Letterman, she goes on about how it's thanks to the troops that he can speak freely and she has the freedom to react to it. A true statement, but in my view, it was not the right thing to say for such an occasion as this.

Sarah Palin accepts David Letterman's apology for 'coarse joke' (Fox News)
Countdown: Monday recappers thread (Olbermann Watch)

Why We're Calling Ms. HuffPo "Mama Bear" 'Round Here...

The giddy genius of Seth McFarlane has produced a spinoff of Family Guy involving Cleveland Brown and his clan. The new 30-minute series - called The Clevelad Show - sends Clevleand and his new family from Quahog, Rhode Island to a small town in Virginia that includes as their neighbors human bears (played by McFarlane and Ariana Huffington). I heard that Mr. Olbermann will drop by this series as a guest voice this season.

The show premieres September 27 at 8:30 PM ET/PT (right between The Simpsons and Family Guy) on your local FOX affiliate.

Countdown Live Blog: 6/15/09

(Guest posted by JFein from Fire Andy Reid Now!)

It is definitely kind of ironic and funny that I am live blogging an episode at Countdown on the same day that I shared an elevator ride with Senator Bob Casey, Jr. (D-PA). If only I had realized it while we were in the elevator and not walking out (curse my terrible habit of day-dreaming!).

And also, if you remember the last time I live blogged an episode of Countdown, Olbermann requested a quarantine of Fox News and said that he would never again use the Ted Baxter voice to mock Bill O'Reilly. Personally, I can only distinctly recall one time where I was in a restaurant or any other public place with a TV where Fixed Noise was on and that was several months ago (before the quarantine, obviously). But since the quarantine, Keith has not mentioned Bill-O on the air. Will that continue tonight or will Bill be a WORST....PERSON.....IN THE WORLD!!! once again? On that note, let's start the show!

I'm going to try to do this a little differently this time and go with a more reaction/analysis approach rather than summarizing what Keith says. Let's see how it works!

We've got Iran, Cheney, healthcare and Bill Maher, and US Air Flight 1549 that crashed into the Hudson and the struggle between the survivors and AIG tonight.

The tie: Purple, but I must say, whomever cut Keith's hair cut it way too short.

Number 5: Mousvavi vs. Ahmadinejad is quickly becoming the Bush vs. Gore of Iran. The question has essentially become did Ahmadinejad tamper with the results? Those charts make it look like he did, and while there certainly is a chance that he might have, I would highly doubt that the election results get overturned as it would be, especially seeing as Ayatollah Khomeini has already sided with Ahmadinejad. Bobby Ghosh from Time Magazine joins us and good grief, he reminds me of my one professor with that accent. The protests on the streets and the deaths are certainly disturbing and some of those images are hard to watch. And despite all of the political back-and-forth in the United States, it is nice to see that most protests are relatively civil here with nothing like what is going on in Iran happened here.

The neo-cons who were at once indifferent to the Iranian presidency as the aforementioned Ayatollah is the supreme ruler in Iran, however, now they are upset and partly blame President Obama for the results as it was Bush's tough foreign policy that kept things in order there. Steve Clemons from the New America Foundation has more. That footbage of the protests is still hard to watch. It's making me want to change the channel and watch something else. At least when O'Reilly does his Culture Warriors segment, there's something half decent to look at. ;-)

What do you guys think? Will the election be overturned? While it would certainly better the U.S. if it was, I don't think there is a rat's chance in hell of that happening.

We've got Letterman and Palin, Cheney, and AIG, U.S. Airways, and a survivor from that flight on the Hudson still to come so stay with us.

Number 4: Is Dick Cheney hoping for another attack on the United States? Leon Panetta suggests that he might, while Cheney vehemently denied it and I would have to agree with Cheney on that. He may be a complete moron, but I would doubt that the 43rd President of the United States, er, I mean veep to the 43rd President, would want that to happen. MSNBC Political Analyst Lawrence O'Donnell joins Keith to discuss more. Going more along the lines on Cheney, his popularity numbers are going to rise. It may not rise high, it may not be above 50%, but it is going to get higher. And the same with Bush's. It is doubtful that history will judge him as the worst president ever, as some suggested would happen during his term (turns away and pretends to stare around as if I have no idea what type of person would dare think such a horrible thought....nope, nothing to see here). And Letterman apologized to Palin again. He's taking the blame for it, although Palin most definitley forced that apology by going on and on about it. While considered liberal (and thus anti-Palin) by most, Letterman is not an ill-willed person like that. He would not intentionally say something like that to and about a 14-year old girl. It is curious to see what the Palin reaction will be. Will she accept it and let bygones be bygones or will she continue to hold a grudge? Palin being the media whore that she is, could go either way. And I don't mean it like that, Miss Wasilla if you are reading this. I DON'T WANT TO HAVE TO ISSUE 15 APOLOGIES EITHER ON BEHALF OF MYSELF, JAMESCRAVEN, AND SOMEHOW EVERY LIBERAL MINDED PERSON OUT THERE FOR THAT JOKE!!!!!!!!

It looks like The Murdoch Street Journal will be up for an award later in worsts. And I have no idea what the hell that was in the Oddball preview.

Oddball: John Lennon first performed at 15 on this day and the debut of Hee-Haw? Talk about Whiskey...Tango...Foxtrot?!? So why on earth did a dog end up being flushed in the toilet?? You gotta love the innocence of a small kid who just thought he was giving the dog a bath. Blago is being able to make fun of himself in some play. Odd. I guess that's why they call it Oddball. And the legacy of Zinedine Zidane lives!!!!!!!!

Obama vs. the GOP on healthcare and AIG vs. Flight 1549 coming up in a jiffy!

Aspeaking of Zidane and soccer in general, anyone watching the FIFA Confederation's Cup? Better yet, anyone following World Cup qualifying? Talk about interesting political implications. You have Iraq in the Confederations Cup and while it is unlikely they will play the U.S. at all seeing as it is unlikely that the U.S. and Iraq will make it out of their respective group, how about the possibility that North Korea qualifies to the World Cup and then ends up in the same group as the U.S.! That would be interesting to watch for sure. And Iran could also end up qualifying.

Number 3: Should the President abondon trying to achieve a bipartisan solution? While I think they should work together, affordable health care for all is a top priority and while the GOP claims that it is socialism and does not belong in the U.S., I say f*** it! Who cares if it is socialism as long as it works and brings about a better quality of life for all. We've got Bill Maher on and he is losing hope on Obama (but he still has audacity!). Not much of a Bill Maher fan. Actually, I don't think I've ever watched him. And speaking of HBO though (wait, it's on HBO, isn't it?), anyone planning on checking out Joe Buck Live? You know what, that may not be as much of a trainwreck as some people think it will be. While I frequently laugh at announcers, Joe Buck is probably the guy that I laugh with the most. That could be a good show. Really. It could. And maybe that's because I don't hate Joe Buck as much as I know others do. I think he's just fine as a football announcer. And maybe that's because he has a good partner in Aikman who is really good when not doing Cowboys games, and the rest of the lineup on Fox is pretty much downright atrocious, including, to steal a nickname that JC has for Michelle Malkin and apply it to someone else, Ashamed-Philadelphian Dick Stockton. And come on, Fox is also the network that passes Brian Baldinger as a credible analyst! (JC: But Baldy's outta a job now!)

Jonah Goldberg is a worst person coming up. Will he win the gold? Find out next!

Number 2 (Worst Person In The World)

Bronze - The Wall Murdoch Street Journal. Obama Administration did not take over Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. Bush did. And they called Obama a backdoor socialist for it. Wow....

Silver - Jonah Goldberg is claiming neo cons are conservative Jews. Yeah, I agree with Keith. I've never heard neo-cons tied with religion.

Gold - City Counil of Brooksville, Florida. They have a crazy dress code in which they require you to wear underwear and will be checking to make sure that you (yes, I'm talking about YOU) are wearing it.

Countdown has some weird commercials. That's all I'll say about that. U.S. Airways survivors vs. AIG coming up next. Insurance people can be such bags of douche at times that it is not even funny.

Number 1: AIG is not willing to pay for psychological counciling for the survivors of U.S. Airways Flight 1549. Tess Sosa, a survivor from that flight comes on to tell us more about AIG's douchebaggery. They're only giving three sessions per passenger??? God, that's cheap. Yeah, um, from what little bit I know about that type of therapy, you need more than three sessions to get that kind of stuff done.

"I think that a lot of the public are empathetic to us." - Tess Sosa

I would hope that all of the public would be empathetic to those survivors. Then again, what the hell do I know?

That's it for me today! Thanks for joining me all! Time to watch the debut of Joe Buck Live on HBO! I'll be back tomorrow for more Countdown and I think I'm doing I Survived A Japanese Gameshow on Wednesday.

When We Win, We Riot; When We Lose, We Riot

Never has the Philadelphia sports mantra towards championships been truer in two seperate instances over three days.

In Pittsburgh, after the Penguins won their first Stanley Cup in 17 years Friday night (6/12) and the city's second title after the Steelers defeated Arizona at Super Bowl Ex-El-Ay-Yai-Yai back in February, one local knucklehead kept alive the time-honored tradition via Morgantown, West Virginia of burning one's couch in the middle of the street. Forty-eight hours later, after the Los Angeles Lakers won the franchise's fifteenth NBA title (after Chick Hern announced from the great press box in the sky that "The refrigerator's closed and the door is shut, the light's out, the butter's getting hard, the eggs are getting cold and the Jell-O's starting to jiggle"), plenty of Angelinos used the excuse near LA Live and the Staples Center to burn down a few newsstands, with 18 arrests and eight of the LAPD injured.

All I can say is "Stay Classy, Penguins and Lakers fans." JFein will be here tonight and tomorrow (6/16) for the Countdown live blogs, if Shuster's not pinch hitting. See you Wednesday (6/17).

"The Granddaddy Of 'Em All" Moves to ESPN in 2011

ESPN now officially has made The Rose Bowl Game a pimp to cable.

In an unexpected move, TWWLS has moved college football's older post-season contest from over-the-air ABC to ESPN starting with the 2011 game. Here's the details.

Countdown Live Blog: 6/12/09

The Tie: Brown with tan spots.

Number 5: Statutory rape. That's what Tina Fey's Evil Twin Sister said about David Letterman's jokes about Bristol Palin, not Willow on The Today Show expanding to all young women and claimed it was a weak excuse. Miss Wasilla 1984 still won't accept the apology for this, even after David did apologize Wednesday (6/10). Have fun storming the imaginary castle in the clouds. Blaming the naive "left-wing" media. Even Michael Steele "Sieve" didn't see the apology. Well, Richard Wolffe, are the Palin family pawns?

Number 4: And the winner of the Iranian Presidential Election is... Depends on who you ask. We're still waiting for Govenor Jeb Bushahad and the hanging chads from Floridaan. (YEAH, I WENT THERE AND BOUGHT THE CONDO!) Election access denials among others. Steve Clemons of TheWashingtonNote.com reports from London.

Oddball: In 1790 George Vancouver discovered the city named after him that will host the next Winter Olympics on the networks of NBC! Happy 85th birthday George H.W. Bush, enjoy jumping out of that airplane whilst parachuting. In Tokyo, at ther annual Food Tech show, more Japanese kickass robots of the week making food. And in kiev, it's a protest of cutting the H2O heat.

Best Persons: 3 - Lyle Silkwood in Columbia, SC jumped from a bridge and survived, but ran out of gas and jumped onto his friends boat. 2 - Freedomworks with commie fail. 1 - Bob McDonnell "Just say yes." The slogan by the group for Posative Sexuality.

Musical Segue: Hall and Oates' "Adult Education." Proud to be from Philly, unlike tonigt's WPitW winner...more later.

Number 3: The Good Oldboysandgirls party will now stonewall Sonia Sotomayor's nomination as will Operation Rescue, a christian far-right nutjob group. Jonathon Alter, what is going on?

Number 2 (Worst Persons in the World)
Bronze - Andy Brightbart, Hollywood nutjob reading Gawker. Stay Classy, sir.
Silver - Comedian Boss Limbaugh blames the healthy for the future National healthcare syste..
Gold - Ashamed native of Philadelphia Michele Magalagang Malkin shiows a tasteless joke about the 9/11 pilots ready to crash into the second Twin Tower about the Miranda rights.

Number 1: It has been one year since Tim Russert passed away in his boots as it were. A reflection back at that fateful day Saturday (6/13)

Have a great weekend. JFein's pinch hitting on Monday and Tuesday (Three-hour RAW on Monday, Phillies-Blue Jays game on Tuesday), so be good to him, and I'll be back on Wednesday (6/17) not only with Countdown and the first live blog of I Survived a Japanese Game Show.

Countdown Live Blog: 6/11/09

The Tie: Red wth white midrodots.

Number 5: A Homeland Security depicition showed that James van Braunn was a right-wing nutcase carrying books with information as a hate crime and domestic terrorism and was an out and out racist. Now that the facts are out, we are joined by Mark potach from the Southern Poverty Law Center.

Comedian Boss Limbaugh and far right nut cases blamed the liberals for van Brann's hatred from com ing from the left. RUSH LIMBAUGH IS A BIG FAT LIAR. Van Brann was a right-wing nut job. Also the usual lies about Palin, Adolph XLIII, and Weinersavage about blacks, Jewish perople and others. Eugene Robinson explains it all as an African-American.

Number 4: Remember the governor of South Carolina? The guy who wanted to send back stim money? Gov. Mark Sanford (R-SC) who lost in court to a senior in high school in court, says it's time to send someone new to be the voice of the Good Oldboysandgirls Party now. Ryan Lizza of The New Yorker comments.

Oddball: The Pennsylvania Railroad had claimed to the fastest railroad on this day. In Russia, there's a guy who makes big spoons! And now, the followup on Bret Michaels goes BOOM! A Tonys publicist clained he missed his mark and he posted pics. Bret's MySpace claimed otherwise.

Best Persons: 3 - Mario Bertuccio in Prague saw a life size photo of a family Christmas Card in a shop. 2 - In New Haven, CT, no H1N1 quaranteens after getting arrested.. 1 - Newt Gingrich reverses field on Miranda rights.

Musical Segue: EMF's "Unbeleievable"!

Number 3: David Letterman's apology was not accepted by Miss Wasilla 1984 and her husband. This after making jokes about eldest daughter Bristol that they thought was at the younger sister Willow on their Fairbook pages. And they won't be on Late Show. Margaret Carlson will now explain.

Number 2 (Worst Persons in the World)
Bronze - Liz Cheney said Adolph XLIII and said that he wouldn't bring terrorists from Gitmo here.
Silver - Coultergeist criticizes Letterman on Tina Fey's Evil Twin Sister.
Gold - Rev. Jeremiah Wright hasn't talked to President Obama in a while, but blamed a lot of Jews. You sir, are a racist.

Number 1: Carrie Prejean who was told by The Donald "YOU'RE FIRED!" as Miss California USA had her presser today.

Oh, no! Michael Musto. I'm off to FARN and the Game 4 Live Blog. GOOD NIGHT EVERYONE!

Countdown Live Blog: 6/10/09

The Tie: Tealish silver.

Number 5: James Van Brunn, 88, killed an security guard named Steven Tyler Johns today at the National Holocaust Museum in Washington, DC a mere mile from 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. Claiming to have been a WWII vet, the Department of Homeland Security warned us about this, the Good Oldboysandgirls Party was outraged about it and Homeland Secratary Janet Napotalino has had to apologize for it. Police clam he was a loner and was sentenced to 6.5 years in jail in 1983 for trying to arrest members of the Federal Reserve Board. Pete Williams updates this story for us. Meanwhile, Prof. Jack Levin of Northeastern University joins us to anaylize the recent events.

Number 4: Any other day, this would be the Number 5 story...Quick, name the leader of the Good Oldboysandgirls Party. Accoridng to a USA TODAY/Gallup Poll, the answer is nobody, with an overwhelming (or in the GOP's case, underwhelming) 52%. However, Comedian Boss Limbaugh was the highest ranked among those that were named at 13%, the Ayatollah Dickcheney got 10% whole John McCain and Newt Gingrich each got six percent, but Tina Fey's Evil Twin Sister only got four votes. Okay, Richard Wolffe, no one is in charge. What do you do?

Oddball: In 1971, Michael Rennie passed away. Another bear in a tree in South Carolina and then in New Mexico. Cue the trampoline again! At the Bush compound, a traveling cast from A Chorus Line dropped by. So, are those actors are you happy to have a birthday, Barbara? And from the mugshot file, Phil Spector's new Wall of Sound is the echoes of his jail cell. Sans toupee.

Best Persons: 3 - AccuWeather.com checked into why homers have been flying out of the new Yankee Satdium and they found out The House That Steinbrenner Built has the fences five feet closer from the old place. 2 - An unknown bankrobber was caught with her heists in a recycled grocery bag. 1 - Carrie Prejean was sacked as Miss California USA by Donald Trump after getting the news from Billy Bush.

Musical Segue: Sha Na Na "Get A Job." They haven't been the same since Bowzer left.

Number 3: Sonia Sotomayor's latest furor amongst the GOP is that over many cases. Sen. Jeff Sessoms (R-AL) claims that she's a racist against white males. Gee, Michael Steele "Sieve", the same saying, eh? The Senate will have vetterd everything but the last 13 years. Well, Chris Cillizza, why we might have to wait until beforwe that First Monday in October for the whole shebang to occur?

Number 2 (Worst Person in the World)
Bronze - Joe Ferra of WorldNetDaily claimed that the personal info about the two doctors with late term abortions was target of Olbermann's segment, and claims he has dozens of viewers. Try 1.2 milion.
Silver - Comedian siad that Obama and God don't have birth certificates, and James Vann Braunn opens fire at the Holocaust Museum. Poor joke, poor timing, poor everything.
Gold - Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN Mars) claimed to send successful Chrysler dealerships along with General Motors dealers along with a state senator. She also said "We've been a super power because of free market ecomonists." That would be economics! This is why WPitW was invented! Firedog Lake, please take note!

Number 1: Mister David Letterman would like to apologize to Bristol, eldest daughter of Miss Wasilla 1984 for the poor choice of humor on his show Monday night (6/8). He also wants to apologize for the "slutty airline flight attendant" joke as well in his Top Ten List. Miss Wasilla 1984, your thoughts? And yes, Keith objected to being near those seats with Rudy Giluianni. Craig Crawford, deliver the punchline!

And so with that, we'll see you tomorrow.

Countdown Live Blog: 6/9/09

The Tie: Navy, white and silver.

Number 5: Newt Gingrich offered his vision of the year 2010...by going back to the 16th Century. Many of the far reich members were there, including the fact that the TARP fialed...with a profit of $1.8 billion, much from big banks as announced today, and saying unemployment was higher than expected (mostly because the GOP EPIC FAILED!) Well, Howard Fineman, Newt Gingrich, Really!?

And whilst this went on and on, and on... We seem to be better off as Newt went off as being not a citizen of the world. He pisses off North Korea, Cuba, Iran, Venezuela that slammed Obama's citizen of the world last July. Who was that masked man who said that? Ronald Wilson Reagan. Margaret Carlsson, please explain to the Good Oldboysandgirls Party why this happens.

Number 4: The terrorists are coming! The terrorists are coming! The first co-conspiator of the US embassy was in New York today to be tried, ask Rep. Eric Cantor (R-VA) about it except that all four of his co-defendants of his are all serving life at the supermax in Colorado. And the rest of the Hoya Paranoyan Republican leaders are screaming. Why not ask Chris Hayes from The Nation.

Oddball: The McCarthy Hearings question was asked 55 years ago. Ask Skeezix about that. In Sugar Creek, Ohio, a 41-year-old man was arrested in a one-piece thong women's swimsuit. And in Florida, a fisherman found a missile in the ocean and hid it...but it was a dud. And on the web, runway on top of a pool equals hilarity as a model falls in!

Best Persons: 3 - Tony Fratto revises history and criticized Obama's 600K jobs saved. 2 - Japan Airlines will no longer carry sporks. All to save fuel. 1 - A Taipei judge ruled a man who knocked off a politican's wig is being sentenced to five months of jailtime.

Musical Segue: The theme from "Hair" by The Cowsills. Wow. Video goodness later tonight from that song!

Number 3: In the Mideast, when Obama's Arab-friendly speech saw the majority in Lebanon lose big. The top party in Lebanon said that someone calls out The Anti-American card, it may fail. Just ask TheWashingtonNote.com's Steve Clemons about that, and the Friday (6/12) Iranian presidential election.

Number 2 (Worst Person in the World)
Bronze - Two New York state senators switched over to the GOP (but are still Democrats).
Silver - Frank Gaffney still an idiot as Assistant Secratary of State, playing the Muslim card on Obama.
Gold - Remember the GOP WTF Moment a few weeks ago critizing Comedian Boss Limbaugh? He knows about and doesn't care...

Number 1: Remember the days that Keith always mocked American Idol? Those days return with the news that Adam Lambert is gay! Idol diva Maria Milito, please tell all!

Ah, good times, good times. I'll be over at FireAndyReidNow.com's live blog checking in on the big ratings disaster night for the NHL's Stanley Cup Finals Game Six (a possible Red Wings clincher) against the NBA Finals Game 3. And on a related note (barring a certain pinch hitter for Keith Olbermann comes about), JFein will sub for me on Monday (6/15).

Countdown Live Blog: 6/8/09

The Tie: Silver, blue and black stripes.

Number 5: Tina Fey's Evil Twin Sister was at the Rays-Yankees game yesterday (6/7) and quoted Newt Gingrich. More on Newt later. She's at the Good Oldboysandgirls Party congressional fundraising event in the game of speaker at the dias of said fundraiser. No comments from Rich Lowry. We do get some from Richard Wolffe.

So who's the leader of the party now, but Palin quoted Gingrich (and Craig Shirley) at another event last week. And brought about the Ronald Reagan change from "Detente" to "Evil Empire", a line used later by Adolph XLIII. Lawrence O'Donnell is here to comment.

Number 4: Sen. Charles Grassley (R-IA) tweeted about President Obama's health plans after the latter's speech on YouTube. Welcome to the new milennium, Dr. Howard Dean.

Oddball: Eddie Gaedel (#1/8) was born on this day. Bret Michaels' Rock Of Love Bus tour came to The Tonys along with Poison who performed and got conked by a giant sign.



And Roger Federer was distracted by a nutcase. We also have a white bengal tiger in a German Zoo. Sigfried and Roy had no comment.

Best Persons: 3 - The Pirate Party won a seat in the Euro Parlement. Arrrr! 2 - Ryan Neaus of hazelton was caught speeding after someone who stole his maryjane. 1 - A woman had bought a lawsuit against Pepsi's Quaker Oats division that there were no real crunch berries in Cap'n Crunch Crunch Berries... WHAT... THE...?!?

Musical Segue: Crunch berries!

Number 3: SCOTUS nominee Sonia Sotomayor tripped and broke her ankle at LaGuardia racing to catch a flight to Washington today. She also got a endorsement from former First Lady Eva Braun, and Gingrich went back to the racist card again.

Still Bushed!: 3 - More money in profits from KBR. 2 - Indian news agency got $7M from Adolph XLIII instead ordering airplanes. 1 - One of the Gitmo many was turned over after seven years didn't ask about a plot, but told all about something else.

Number 2 (Worst Person in the World)

Bronze - Gov. Tim Palenti (R-MN) evoked the Eminem/Sasha Baron Cohen act at the MTV Movie Awards.

Silver - A new charity event as a carry-your-gun to church event in Louisville.

Gold - Rep. Pete Hostrka (R-MI) calims in a secret report that enhanced interrigation techniques waterbording works. When others say it so, they go to jail; when he says to it makes him a hypocrite.

Number 1: The man who killed Dr. George Tiller, Scott Roeder, says that there are others that are out there that will do what he did last weekeend. Why isn't he being waterboarded? Denise O'Donnell, deputy pubic safety secratary for the State of New York, answers those questions.

I'm off to RAW. See you tomorrow.

Countdown Live Blog: 6/4/09

Congrats to San Francisco Giants pitcher The Big Unit, Randy Johnson, becoming the 24th (and most likely last of this generation) on winning his 300th game over the Washington Nationals by the score of 5-1 in the first game of a makeup doubleheader. He also became the sixth lefthander to reach the mark.

The Tie: Tan and white stripes.

Number 5: "If al-Qaeda wants to destroy [the country] we know and love, they better hurry because [President Obama] is beating them to it." With that, Comedian Boss Limbaugh has now landed on Mr. Obama's $#!+ list. This hours after Obama made his speech in Cairo, Egypt this morning to the Muslim world. The 44th President stated that there is no war with Islam, but relentlessly confront extreme opposition, get us out of the failure in Iraq, mentioned the 3,000 deaths of those on 9/11 via al-Qaeda. The President also mentioned the holocaust, saying Jews and Palistines should get along and play nice, and also mentioned that 9/11 will no longer be used an excuse for war or waterboarding and other forms of torture, and also spoke about The Golden Rule. He also went on tourist duty, opting out of Ron Emanuel's camel riding. So Howard Fineman, how'd the speech go?

The president will go to Germany to visit a concentration camp tomorrow (6/5) and then to Normandy for the 65th anniversary of D-Day to complete the trip Saturday (6/6).

Number 4: More on Mr. Far Reich Wing Extremeist No Longer De Facto Leader of the Good Oldboysandgirls Party's comments from Eugene Robinson. Maybe it's time to officially retire the Follow The Bouncing Rush tag.

HILARITY ALERT: In the segue to the break during the 8 PM livecast, they showed a bear in a tree while talking about Matt Hasselbeck's sister-in-law's comments of democorocy in Obama's speech on The View. Stay tuned for the Worsts for more.

Oddball: In 1965, Andrea Jaeger was born, and now she's a nun in Durango, Colorado. In nearby Breckenridge, it's a bear in a tree who came down on his own. And in Toronto another bear was up in a tree, and cue the bouncing bear with our old friend Craig Kilborn!

Meanwhile, in Amhurst, New York, there's a cat in a wheel well. From Buffalo. Probly didn't like TO. And in Ardmore, Oklahoma the annual forklist rodeo was held.

Best Persons: 3 - George Jackson, who was third in Tuesday's WPitW (6/2), had his facts mixed up on Tiger Stadium. 2 - Hal Turner, internet radio host pulls a Billo The Clown and states the names and addresses of politicians, and was arrested for creating a disturbance. 1 - Peter Bielecke from Trenton was arrested for six weeks of bank robbery. Every Thursday. It happens like clockwork.

Musical Segue: Se habla espanol?

Number 3: The Adolph XLIII plan for the Mideast was that Israel froze all assests on the left bank, but kept building houses anyway. Obama is ignoring it according to Israeli prime minister Ben "Nothing But the Bottom Of The" Netinyahu. Col. Lawrence Wilkenson, USA (Ret.) now will tell you why this is going on.

Still Bushed!: 3 - More Blackwater murder suits were filed. 2 - War Crimes for another United Nations call with War Crimes. 1 - In 1999, if Adolph XLIII ever became President, he wanted to follow his father into Iraq. Daddy said like Hamlet's ghost "AVENGE ME, W. AVENGE ME!!!" Best quote from retired comic Dennis Miller BTW before crossing over to the dark side.

Number 2 (Worst Persons in the World)

Bronze - Rep. Lamar Smith (R-TX) has a new media caucus thing. See "mediamatters.org". Try being congressmen.

Silver - Matt Hasselbeck's sister-in-law and Michael Rubin didn't hear the word "democracy" in Obama's speech. Try hearing it four times.

Gold - Jill Stannic of WorldDailyNet posts two more locations for late term abortions. Now crazy gunmen will go there and asassinate the doctors.

Number 1: When the GOP Senators says it's time for stop slamming Judge Sotomayor on her road to SCOTUS, aides says "Keep the pressure on." Manuel Miranda, he of the filibuster and third place WPitW on Wednesday (6/3) has given up the ghost. Chris Cillizza tells us more.

I'll tell you what, I'll be back tomorrow for the start of the weekend.

Randy Orton is an Asshat, Even Out of Character

This video summerizes the fact that Randy Orton has lost his mind.



Thanks to Keith at his Sports Journal Blog for the heads up. BTW, Orton was "punished" by being forced to drop the belt to Batista in a steel cage match at the One Night Stand Extreme Rules PPV Sunday (6/7).

Countdown Live Blog: 6/3/09

The Tie: Brown, tan and black stripes.

Number 5: Newt Gingrich and Sen. Jon Cornyn (R-TX) both take back the comments they made about Judge Sotomayor. That makes Comedian Boss Limbaugh upset, but admits he flip flops toward her saying it's okay to have a "racist" on SCOTUS. Eugene Robinson thinks that it's - all dare we say - sweet cream on an ice cream sammich.

Meanwhile, President Obama is cutting the Good Oldboysnadgirls Party with a New York congressman being nominated to Secratary of the Army and Gov. Jon Huntsman of Utah to be Ambassador to China. The New Yorker's Ryan Lizza examines this.

Number 4: Herr Goebles again was involved with talks on defending enhanced interrigation techniques waterboarding in 2005. Three years after it started. All in 40 meetings. Okay, Chris Hayes form The Nation, why Y2K+5?

Oddball: In 1789, Anderson McKenzie started out to find his own river. Once again, don't bring a baseball bat to no gunfight or robbert. At Miss Czech 2009 the host fell down. Last but not least, in Palm Beach, they found four kittens in the engine block.

Number 3: President Obama is in the Middle East for the speech to give in Cairo, whilst Osama bin Laden released a new audio. Why isn't this man been captured and placed on trial for 9/11? Richard Wolffe will now talk about his new book Renegade: The Making of a President and see what he sees in the Mideast.

Still Bushed!: 3 - Herr Ayatollah Dickcheney said Adolph XLIII didn't want to pull the plug on GM. 2 -Ex-CIA Chief of Pakistan Milt Beardon call BS on waterboarding. 1 - Hallburton KBR issues a statement that media blamed us on electrical work on those showers.

Number 2 (Worst Person in the World)
Bronze - Manuel Miranda, said "Hispanics think like everyone else. Not like African-Americans." He's leading the fillibuster against Sotomayor, and is also a racist, gracias por favor.
Silver - Rep. Jim Jordan (R-OH) is angered that GM closed his district's plant and wants President Obama to reopen it. Blames it on micromanagement by Obama...really?
Gold - Comedian Boss Limbaugh riffs on Obama's visit by ripping Muslims and the Nobel Peace Prize. Michael Weinersavage. Paging Michael Weinersavage. Remember November 2007?

Number 1 (The Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?!? Moment): President Obama has read one book since April 2008...mostly because he's been busy. Meanwhile, Adolph XLIII and Turdblossom had a reading contest over the last three lame dick, er, lame duck years of Adolph's Gestapo. Adolph read 183 books...Uh, ever read the security briefings, Herr Bush?

I'll see you tomorrow.

Countdown Live Blog: 6/2/09

The Tie: Purple.

Number 5: Quick quiz: How many Good Oldboysnadgirls Party members signed a statement saying they will fillibuster against Sonia Sotomayor? The answer is 143, and most of them said that they would not fillibuster four years ago. Fillibuster? We hardly knew her. This after Sen. mitch McConnell (R-KY) hosted a meeting with her this day. Anyway, Howard Fineman gives us a lesson in journalism for us about it.

The man wo killed Dr. George Tiller has pleaded not guilty to his asasination style murder in a Kansas church. A friend of Dr. Tiller, Susan Hill, joins Keith.

Number 4: So, when did Herr Goebles admits that there was a lik beween 9/11, Saddam Hussein, Al-Qaeda and claim that enhanced interrigation techniques waterboarding work? On Fixed Noise last night (6/1), he's moving away from that all. He also made the comments at the National Press Club beforehand. Mama Bear Huffington joins us to leer into this (without our pal Seth MacFarlane).

Oddball: In 1955, Dana Carvey was born. *Church Lady impression* Well, isn't that special. Anartican Penguins will be followed via #2 on the latest March of the Penguins. Sorry, Keith, Dan was not available for your mike pass. In Italy, Rafael de Rosa has problems in the Italian Grand Prix for motorcycles. In New Zealand, a pigeon was hurt in a cricket match. Cue Randy Johnson's implosion of a pigeon.

Best Persons: 3 - Countdown tops all in the vital 18-34 year old catergory at 8 PM ET. 2 - Mr. Yuan lost $2 million at Lost Wages' the Venetian Casino because a lot of feng shui, now he's suing. 1 - Rep, Virginia Foxx (R-NC) has told all in Congress to join her for "office beers" on your dime.

Musical Segue: Beer, beer, beer!

Number 3: A blatiant sneak preview/plug for the two-part for ex-intern Brain Williams' inside look at the Obama White House tonight and tomorrow (6/2 and 6/3) at 9 PM ET/PT on the NBC Universal mothership. A dozen crews, 150 hours whittled down to two hours over two nights.

Number 2 (Worst Person in the World)

Bronze - George Jackson is a villain by means of tearing down Tiger Stadium.

Silver - Stew Taylor of the National Journal claims Sotomayor's letter about lack of Hispanics at Princeton should be evidence against her nomination.

Gold - The owners of ten Burger King stores in Memphis claimed global warming is baloney. The chairman of home company disagrees. "Have it your way...or else."

Number 1 (The Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?!? Moment): Did you hear the one about the Marathon County, Wisconsin GOP spokesperson near Wausau named Kevin Stephenson who was sacked because he disagreed with Comedian Boss Limbaugh? Isn't that how the Whig Party started to fall apart?

WTF? Indeed See you tomorrow night.

Countdown Live Blog: 6/1/09

(Guest posted by JFein from Fire Andy Reid Now!)

Happy June everyone!

The Tie: Burnt orange.

Number 5: Dr. George Tiller was assassinated earlier today. As we all know, Tiller was a strong proponent of abortions and was a doctor who performed many of them, including notorious late-term abortions. And JC's favorite right-wing blogger, Michelle Malkin who happens to be from Philly (I can guarantee that you that this city, a strongly democratic city, does not claim her), is trying to tie Katherine Sebalius to Dr. Tiller and several other right wingers and pro-lifers consider Tiller a baby killer and are still considering him a mass murderer. Those remarks were made after his death. Richard Wolffe, who was supposed to talk about his new book today, Renegade, joins us to talk more about the insinuation of violence from the far right and pro lifers.

Andrew Sullivan from The Atlantic, has more about the response to Dr. Tiller's assassination.

Number 4: GM has filed for bankrupty and the government and subsequently the taxpayers now own 60% of GM. I own a car company! Yay! I am giddy! President Obama and the Federal Government will be hesitant to do anything with it, preferring to let GM take care of GM's problems. Michael Moore joins us. What does it say about Moore when you consider the fact that I am a fairly strong liberal Democrat and I could at best careless for this moron.

Oddball: CNN premiered on this date. And a deer did not jump over the moon, but rather over the hood of a car. We've got a space shuttle on a airplane. A 15-foot fish is asleep on the surface and apparently it's an earthquake predictor. Who knew?

Number 3: Lt. General Ricardo Sanchez is on to tell us more about talk about torture, claiming that we need to know the truth about what happened or else the past is doomed to happen again. And after all of the talk of the GOP telling us to listen to the generals, how much do you want to bet that they will denounce him and say don't listen to him because he is against torture? Scott McClellan and Mancow know the feeling. And Lt. Gen. Sanchez believes there should be prosecution.

Number 2 (Worst Persons In The World)

Bronze - William Kristol is suggesting a few air strikes on North Korea.

Silver - Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-KY) thinks that he has better things to do than to be the "speech police" for the people in the appointment of Sotomayor.

Gold - Comedian Boss Limbaugh wants to appoint David Duke to SCOTUS in reponse to President Obama's Sotomayor, but Duke now claims P\/\/N3RSHIP of Limbaugh.

Number 1: Is Fixed Noise partly responsible for inciting the assassination of Dr. Tiller? Video is below.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

JC will be back tomorrow. Thanks for joining me and see you next time!

MLB's TV Partners Prohibits You From Seeing The Last Two World Series Champions Play Each Other...Unless You Have Cash Monies, Homie

There are assholes, and then there are TV programmers. Both seem to have their heads up their arrears at the same time. Take for example, the folks at TBS, ESPN, FOX and MLB Network.

Please.

On the weekend of June 12th through June 14th, the last two teams that won the World Series - the Boston Red Sox (2007) and the Philadelphia Phillies (2008) - will be playing a three-game series at Citizens Bank Park. Guess how many games will be telvised on one of those networks.

None. Zip. Nada. Zilch. Bubkus.

That's right. None of them. So, what games will be on national television that weekend? Let's check the schedules, kids.

• FOX June 13 - New York Mets at New York Yankees or St. Louis Cardinals at Cleveland Indians, 4 PM ET.
• MLB Network June 13 - San Diego Padres at Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim Orange County California USA Western Hemisphere Third Rock From the Sun Milky Way Galaxy Crab Nebula, 9 PM ET.
• TBS June 14 - New York Mets at New York Yankees, 1 PM ET (Headline News in New York City area).
• ESPN June 14 - St. Louis Cardinals at Cleveland Indians, 8 PM ET.

I can possibly understand the Mets-Yankees thing, but the last place Cleveland Fucking Indians and the last place San Diego Motherfucking Padres? Can someone have these prickheads take a damn cocksucking drug test to see what they were eating/drinking/smoking when they made these decisions? The die was cast a week earlier when ESPN decided to put the Phillies-Dodgers NLCS rematch for that week's Sunday Night Baseball telecast on June 7th. As far as I'm concrened, the Cardinals-Indians game was better off on KSDK in St. Louis and WKYC in Cleveland, thus in turn, pissing off those at NBC.

Sadly, the greedy motherfucking bastards at Major League Baseball will make these games available because as Ted DiBiase the elder says "Everybody's got a price...Everybody's gonna pay...'Cause [MLB]...Always gets [their] way." Those games (except in New England and the Valley of the Delaware) are readily available via their Extra Innings digital cable/DirecTV package or via the internet on MLB.tv. The sadder part? DirecTV doesn't carry Comcast SportsNet Philadelphia thanks to an obscurely antiquated FCC rule about exclusivtivity and Comcast's preferrence to use microwave/fiber optics.

So I give a great big loud FUCK YOU to TimeWarner, NewsCorpse and Disney as well as MLB's in house TV operations for this gigantic pile of bullshit. You made your beds, now the fans outside New England and Philadelphia expect you to lay there, you cocksucking assholes.

Countdown Live Blog: 5/29/09

The Tie: Gray with black diagonal stripes.

Number 5: The Goodoldboysandgirls Party smear campaign on Justice Sonia Sotomayor has become The Civil War. Michael Steele, RNC chairman, Charles Krauthammer, Peggy Noonan and Sen. Jon Cornyn (R-TX) have said people like Comedian Boss Limbaugh should stop being part of the process and just SHUT THE FUCK UP! Meanwhile, Limbaugh compared Sotomayor to former KKK leader (and politician) David Duke. Bad choice, Mr. Limbaugh. So have Inanity, Professor Harold Hill, Tom Tancredo, Michael Weinersavage, Coultergeist, Turdblossom, Fred Barnes, Bill Bennett been told to stay far away...even they have attacked her. Richard Wolffe, please straighten this up. He's also here to plug his new book Renagade: The Making of a President.

Number 4: More on Sotomayor's attacks from the "Angry White Male Far Right Wing Nutjob" was in this case from National Review Online contributor John Derbyshire in reverse racism. Lawrence O'Donnell, what say thou?

Oddball: In 1917, JFK was born. In London, plastic bunnies (no, not the Playboy variety) are trash containers. In Dallas, birds are attacking police officers and TV reporters.

Best Persons: 3 - A passport was swiped from a New Zealand tourist from Scotland by a parrot. Pining for the Fjords? 2 - On Professor Harold Hill's Happy Hour, Craig T. Nelson said he never wanted to bail out the car makers. 1 - Cal Thomas will sail the Holland America Noordam along with Rich Lowry. Keith's hint: Just stay away from Lowry's cabin.

Musical Segue: Theme from Gilligan's Island.

Number 3: Adolph XLII joins Herr Goebles in defense on enhanced interrigation techniques waterboarding torture. And Sen. Carl Levin (D-MI) says he's seen the cvlassified memos that says that it worked, but that is wrong as wrong can be. And how did "Matthew Alexander" asked one why he wanted to slit "Alexander's" throat? To give information.

Number 2 (Worst Person in the World)
Bronze - New York City Mayor Michael Bloomburg apologised to a reporter from The New York Observer. Via a staffer.
Silver - National organization for Marriage (Carrie Prejean's organization) misspells "marriage" in an ad.
Gold - G. Gordon Liddy believes that Sotomayor is in that time of the month...especially now.

Number 1: So the far right wing blogging idiots claimed that last week's ManCow waterboarding was a hoax. Yeah, right, and ManCow Muller joins us to deny it all. I'm damn sure that was real H₂O in that pitcher in the video.

Enjoy the weekend, everyone. And I'll be back on Monday.

Countdown Live Blog: 5/28/09

Former Minnesota Governor Jessie "The Body, The Mind" Ventura is tonight's special guest.

Countdown Live Blog: 5/27/09

The Tie: Red with white microdots.

Number 5: Like we said last night, the far reich is on Sonia Sotomayor's case. They're calling her a racist, a bigot, uneducated (in spite of being a Princeton grad) and even her favorite meal - pigs ears and noodles - could cause a decision go her way. That okay with you, Eugene Robinson?

Meanwhile, the two lawyers who faced one another in Adolph vs. Gore in 2000, will join forces to sue the state of California to repeal Prop 8. And hell just became the Rockefeller Center skating rink at Christmas. John Dean, we finally get bipartianship at last?

Number 4: Just when Fredo Gonzalez thought he was out, Ms. Sotomayor pulled him back in. And he's blaming the Justice Department enhanced interrigation techniques torture on January 22, 2002 as White House Counsel. Well, Jay Bybee sent a couple memos and was cleared by Condi Rice, The Wicked Bitch of the West in her role of National Security Advisor. Tell us more, Chris Hayes from The Nation.

Oddball: In 1911 Vincent Price was born. Play Michael Jackson's "Thriller" in his honor. Remember the story of that suicidal man and the frustrated senior citizen? Here's the video proof. In Jacksonville, a fish camp saw a alligator in the men's room. I'll leave you to the jokes. And in Prague, a politican from the Social Democrat party was egged by students. "The Socialist Democrat Party. What...The...?" It's genius, genius I tells ya!

Best Persons: 3 - Security in an American airport saw a French guy from a drug for chemotheropy had missing fingerprints. 2 - Rabin Osman in Oregon called 911 to ask McDonald's for a juice box. 1 - Julien's of Los Angeles will auction off Elvis' perscription drug bottles. Thank you. Thank you very much.

Musical Segue: "Ladies and gentlemen, Elvis has left the building. Thank you and good night."

Number 3: Back to ManCow Muller and his thought about waterboarding was torture. Even to those who didn't want to admit to it, even to Inanity. Rachael Maddow, what say you?

Number 2 (Worst Person in the World)
Bronze - Col. Ralph Peters of Fixed Noise wants to kill all those at Gitmo.
Silver - Another Fixed Noise actor, Bill Hemmer, heard about quoting Norman Thomas, but never mentioned it.
Gold - Mark Precorian on National Review Online says Judge Sotomayor should change the pronounciation of her name.

Number 1 (The Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?!? Moment): Here's tonight's edition, compliments of ThinkProgress.org. See if you can make the connection between him and the Gabby Hayes wannabe from Blazing Saddles. And it ain't Roy Rogers' new "Triggerburgers", either!





And while speaking of connections, we'll connect again tomorrow night.

I Think I've Found My Worst...Person...IN THE WORLD!

This clown.

WARNING: NSFW, the kids or those Phillies fans who dislike clowns like the guy who posted this.

Countdown Live Blog: 5/26/09

The Tie: Blue, black, white and silver stripes.

Number 5: Sonia Sotomayor, Phi Beta Kappa at Princeton and Yale Law School and the nominee for the vacant Supreme Court position, faces opposition...from Comedian Boss Limbaugh, Turdblossom (who pushed forward the Harriet Myers nomination), National Review's web site and Fixed Noise. And did we need that graphic? Meanwhile, eleven Good Oldboysandgirls Party Senators who were against her appointment in 1995 to Court of Appeals are still in office. White House press sec Robert Gibbs gets the third degree. Meanwhile, Howard Fineman wll put the political spin on this.

Number 4: It looks like that Judge Sotomayor will have the needed 60 votes but don't tell that to Michael Steele "Sieve", GOP figurehead leader. Prof. Jonathon Turley looks at the legal matters of her nomination. In a subplot of the segment, California's Supreme Court upheld Prop 8, but allowed the 18,000 pre-banishment joint agreements for their living partners.

Oddball: Now with fun video goodness. If it's an Bank Holiday, then it's time for that annual rite of broken bones known as the Downhill Cheese Run in Glousteshire, England.



We have mascot-on-soccer player violence in Norway. It's the world's game, don't you know?



Meanwhile, WEWS anchors celebrate LeBron's big shots.


Best Persons: 3 - A Nebraska thief stole nine packs of smokes with a Bud Light box...but left it behind in Lincoln. 2 - A Chinese guy pushed a suicide attemper and got arrested. 1 - A second Tour de France...for prisioners. "A chance to getaway and escape" said one particapant. Wrong choice of words?

Musical Segue: Queen's Bicycle Race! Enjoy.

Number 3: Gen. Petraeus is for the closing of Gitmo and against enhanced interigation techniques waterboarding. So is Gen. Colin Powell, USA (Ret.), former Secratary of State in the first term of the Adolph XLIII Gestapo and also criticized Boss Limbaugh and W. Jonathon Alter anaylizes.

Number 2 (Worst Person in the World)
Bronze - David Zawarach calims Keith's heading this country toward socialism. The Baltimore Sun is headed toward bankruptcy.
Silver - A National Review blogger claims that it's been eight and a half years since 9/11. Brilliant mathmatics, chump.
Gold - Laura Ingram says that there were three detainees, echoing Ayatollah Dickcheney.

Number 1: The conserative morning show host who took waterboarding and denounced it as torture, ManCow Muller, joins us.

Sorry kids, no Still Bushed! or Whiskey Tango Foxtrot Moment this evening. Join us manana.

Don't Invite Dennis Eckersley Back to the NESN Booth Soon

While we here at The O Files are wishing Jerry Remy well as he recovers from cancer, NESN has been using fill ins on their Red Sox telecasts. On Friday (5/22), Dennis Eckersley, Hall of Fame starter and closer, as well as TBS studio anaylist, was in the anaylist's seat, and let's just say there were a couple of NSFW moments for the kids or offices. First, he blurts out a "Gianluca Pagliuca" moment that would have made Gary Miller proud:

Needless to say, that wasn't the only Ralph Kiner/Jerry Coleman malaprop Eck had. Listen closely to the name of the pitcher:

We could have read lips and knew Eck was not praying. Oh, and Eck, since you had to bring up the word "masterbate" I am forced to bring this out in your honor:

And You Wonder Why Fox Demoted Their Top NFL Director

They should demote their lead baseball producer. As per Fire Andy Reid Now, the following video in HD:

BTW, John Mayberry Jr. was sent back to Lehigh Valley after the Sunday game.

Recapping A Visit To Fallon's

Well, as stated, Keith was on Tomorrow Coast to Coast with Tom Snyder and Rona Bartlet Late Night With David Letterman Conan O'Brien Jimmy Fallon this morning ET, and the talked about the lack of dancing ability that Keith had for the Dance Challenge contest Fallon is holding, baseball cards (Keith gave away one of his cards to Fallon, modeled after after the 1959 Topps series) and showed a couple of Oddball clips with the kickass Japanese Robot of the week, the teacher and those crazy sheep dogs herding into the LEDs and all.

Have a safe holiday weekend, enjoy the barbeques and trips to the mountains, shores and do remember why we celebrate the holiday. Live blogging resumes this Tuesday (5/26).

Apologies On No Live Blog

I would like to apologize for not having a live blog this evening (5/22). I had a long night of sleep and missed the show.

However, you may have noticed a new subhead. ManCow Muller of WLS-AM 890 in Chicago did take a waterboarding challenge and lasted all of six seconds and did indeed state that indded he feared for his life, proving Sean Inanity is inded chicken$#!+. As a result, Keith will donate $10K to Veterans of Valor, and so I will donate $1.00 to same charity ASAP. You still can contribute by e-mailing me at TheInatitFund@gmail.com, though the most financial ones though were scams for British Lottery prizewinnings...

Other highlights from my dazed and confused stupor:

• Gov. Rich Perry (R-Texas) wants to use $11 million in stimulai to repair the Texas governor's mansion to win WPitW. Runner up was the folks at Verizon who wanted to have an Ohio sherriff pay $20 to reactivate a customer's phone that he defaulted on. CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?! And second runner up goes to Liberty university, a/k/a Moral Majority Tech for kicking a Christian Democratic club off campus.
• And a beauty from WDIV in Detroit, you know, the station that ran the crawl of Matt Millen's Detroit Lions career in the Super Bowl Sunday in America pre-game back in February? Mr. Eaton Beaver turned 69 that day.
  Matt, was that you? Sadly, Post Newsweek, owners of WDIV, had the video removed from YouTube.
• Oh, yeah they ran the new "Follow the Bouncing Boss Limbaugh" graphic in a repeat of Wednesday's WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT?!? moment. It registered a 4.2 in the West Palm Beach area from what we understand.

Anyway, recap of Mr. Olbermann on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon in a bit.

Keith Visits Jimmy Fallon Tonight (5/22)

Did I ever tell you about the time Jimmy Fallon was with Sarah Palin's nice twin sister on Saturday Night Live a decade ago?

Well he's taken over as the host of Late Night from Conan O'Brien, who's moving on to take over for Jay Leno on The Tonight Show starting June 1st. Fallon welcomes Keith tonight to his show at 12:37 AM ET/PT. Yes, there will be a recap.